Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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