Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
