And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
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