ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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