U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
