While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
