This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
