no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
