we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize