When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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