This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Randomize
