Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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