rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
