I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize