im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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