Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
