also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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