Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
It's like God shit irony all over that family
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
