I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
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