no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
His nipple licking is glorious
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