nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
