i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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