wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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