Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
