pop tarts are not kleenex
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
