I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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