It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
