No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize