guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
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