The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
