She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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