Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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