Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
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