The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize