my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I'm like, not good at living.
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