??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
