she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
