I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
