She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
so let's talk penis.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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