WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
oh god the rape fog is back!
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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