I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
