Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
