i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
