Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
