My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
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