i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
