Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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