he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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