No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
