I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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