I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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