he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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